Bride kidnapping, also known as marriage by abduction or marriage by capture, is a practice in which a man or boy abducts the woman or girl he wishes to marry.
Bride kidnapping (hence the portmanteau bridenapping) has been practiced around the world and throughout prehistory and history, among peoples as diverse as the Hmong in Southeast Asia, the Tzeltal in Mexico, and the Romani in Europe. Bride kidnapping still occurs in various parts of the world, but it is most common in the Caucasus, Central Asia, the Amazon rainforest, and some parts of Africa.
In most nations, bride kidnapping is considered a sex crime because of the implied element of rape, rather than a valid form of marriage. Some types of it may also be seen as falling along the continuum between forced marriage and arranged marriage. The term is sometimes confused with elopements, in which a couple runs away together and seeks the consent of their parents later. In some cases, the woman cooperates with or accedes to the kidnapping, typically in an effort to save face for herself or her parents. In many jurisdictions, this used to be encouraged by so-called marry-your-rapist laws. Even in countries where the practice is against the law, if judicial enforcement is weak, customary law ("traditional practices") may prevail.
Bride kidnapping is often (but not always) a form of child marriage. It may be connected to the practice of bride price, wealth paid by the groom and his family to the bride's parents, and the inability or unwillingness to pay it.
Bride kidnapping is distinguished from raptio in that the former refers to the abduction of one woman or girl by one man (and his friends and relatives), and is still a widespread practice, whereas the latter refers to the large scale abduction of women by groups of men, possibly in a time of war. Raptio was assumed to be a historical practice, hence the Latin term, but the 21st century has seen a resurgence of war rape, some of which has elements of bride kidnapping; for example, women and girls abducted by Boko Haram in Nigeria, the Lord's Resistance Army in Uganda and ISIS in the Middle East have been taken as wives by their abductors.
Rituals indicating a symbolic bride kidnapping still exist in some cultures (such as Circassians), as part of traditions surrounding a wedding. According to some sources, the honeymoon is a relic of marriage by capture, based on the practice of the husband going into hiding with his wife to avoid reprisals from her relatives, with the intention that the woman or girl would be pregnant by the end of the month.See, e.g., William Shepard Walsh, Curiosities of Popular Customs and of Rites, Ceremonies, Observances, and Miscellaneous Antiquities, (J.B. Lippincott Co., 1897), p. 654; John Lubbock, The Origin of Civilisation and the Primitive Condition of Man: Mental and Social Condition of Savages, (Appleton, 1882), p. 122. Curtis Pesmen & Setiawan Djody, Your First Year of Marriage (Simon and Schuster, 1995) p. 37. Compare with Edward Westermarck, The History of Human Marriage (Allerton Book Co., 1922), p. 277 (refuting the link between honeymoon and marriage by capture).
Background and rationale
Though the motivations behind bride kidnapping vary by region, the cultures with traditions of marriage by abduction are generally patriarchal with a strong social stigma on sex or pregnancy outside marriage and illegitimate births.See Brian Stross, "Tzeltal Marriage by Capture", Anthropological Quarterly, Vol. 47, No. 3, Kidnapping and Elopement as Alternative Systems of Marriage (Special Issue) (July 1974), pp. 328–346 (describing Tzeltal culture as patriarchal with a few opportunities for "pre-marital cross-sex interaction")[hereinafter Stross, Tzeltal Marriage by Capture]; Sabina Kiryashova, "Azeri Bride Kidnappers Risk Heavy Sentences", Institute of War and Peace Reporting, 17 November 2005 (discussing the shame brought on Azeri kidnap victims who spend a night outside of the house); Gulo Kokhodze & Tamuna Uchidze, "Bride Theft Rampant in Southern Georgia", (discussing the Georgian case, where "great social stigma attaches to the suspicion of lost virginity."). Compare with In some modern cases, the couple colluded to elope under the guise of a bride kidnapping, presenting their parents with a fait accompli. In most cases, however, the men who resort to capturing a wife are often of lower social status, because of poverty, disease, poor character or criminality.See Stross, Tzeltal Marriage by Capture (Tzeltal culture); (Hmong culture); Alex Rodriguez, Kidnapping a Bride Practice Embraced in Kyrgyzstan, Augusta Chronicle, 24 July 2005 (Kyrgyz culture); They are sometimes deterred from legitimately seeking a wife because of the payment the woman's family expects, the bride price (not to be confused with a dowry, paid by the woman's family).See Stross, Tzeltal Marriage by Capture, pp. 342–343;
In agricultural and patriarchal societies, where bride kidnapping is most common, children work for their families. A woman leaves her birth family, geographically and economically, when she marries, becoming instead a member of the groom's family. (See patrilocality for an anthropological explanation.) Due to this loss of labour, the women's families do not want their daughters to marry young, and demand economic compensation (the aforementioned bride price) when they do leave them. This conflicts with the interests of men, who want to marry early, as marriage means an increase in social status, and the interests of the groom's family, who will gain another pair of hands for the family farm, business or home.Human Rights Watch, Reconciled to Violence: State Failure to Stop Domestic Abuse and Abduction of Women in Kazakhstan, Vol. 8, No. 9, September 2006, p. 117 ("Families in Kyrgyzstan generally exploit the labor of new brides as a way of adding to the resources and productivity of the household with little cost to the family.Families in Kyrgyzstan generally exploit the labor of new brides as a way of adding to the resources and productivity of the household with little cost to the family."); Sabina Kiryashova, "Azeri Bride Kidnappers Risk Heavy Sentences", Institute of War and Peace Reporting, 17 November 2005, ("Even more sinister are reports of kidnapped brides being taken abroad or used as slaves at home. "There have been cases when girls were abducted and used as housekeepers", said Saida Gojamanli from the Human Rights and Legislation Protection Bureau.") Depending on the legal system under which she lives, the consent of the woman may not be a factor in judging the validity of the marriage.
In addition to the issue of forced marriage, bride kidnapping may have other negative effects on young women and their society. For example, fear of kidnap is cited as a reason for the lower participation of girls in the education system.Save the Children, Learning from Children, Families and Communities to Increase Girls' Participation in Primary School
The mechanism of marriage by abduction varies by location. This article surveys the phenomenon by region, drawing on common cultural factors for patterns, but noting country-level distinctions.
Africa
Egypt There have been cases of Coptic Christian women and girls abducted, forced to convert to Islam and then married to Muslim men.
Ethiopia Bride kidnapping is prevalent in many regions of Ethiopia. According to surveys conducted in 2003 by the National Committee on Traditional Practices in Ethiopia, the custom's prevalence rate was estimated at 69 percent nationally, and highest in the Southern Nations, Nationalities and People's Region at 92 percent. A man working in co-ordination with his friends may kidnap a girl or woman, sometimes using a horse to ease the escape.BBC, "Ethiopia: Revenge of the Abducted Bride", 18 June 1999. The abductor will then hide his intended bride or bring her to his family and rape her, sometimes in front of his family, until she becomes pregnant. As the father of the woman's child, the man can claim her as his wife.BBC, "Ethiopia: Revenge of the Abducted Bride" Subsequently, the kidnapper may try to negotiate a bride price with the village elders to legitimize the marriage. Girls as young as eleven years old are reported to have been kidnapped for the purpose of marriage.UN Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, ETHIOPIA: Surviving forced marriage Though Ethiopia criminalised such abductions and raised the marriageable age to 18 in 2004, the law has not been well implemented.UN Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, ETHIOPIA: Surviving forced marriage; State Department Human Rights Report – Ethiopia A 2016 UNICEF evidence review (based on data from 2010 and 2013) estimated that 10 to 13 percent of marriages in the highest risk areas involved abduction, with rates of 1.4 percent to 2.4 percent in lower risk areas of the country.
The bride of the forced marriage may suffer from the psychological and physical consequences of forced sexual activity and early pregnancy and the early end to her education.UN Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, ETHIOPIA: Surviving forced marriage Women and girls who are kidnapped may also be exposed to sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV/AIDS.
Kenya Forced marriages continue to be a problem for young girls in Kenya. The United States Department of State reports that children and young teenaged girls (aged ten and up) are sometimes married to men two decades older.United States State Department, Kenya: Country Reports on Human Rights Practices – 2007, 11 March 2008
Marriage by abduction used to be, and to some extent still is, a customary practice for the Kisii ethnic group. In their practice, the abductor kidnaps the woman forcibly and rapes her in an attempt to impregnate her. The "bride" is then coerced through the stigma of pregnancy and rape to marry her abductor. Though most common in the late 19th century through the 1960s, such marriage abductions still occur occasionally.Immigration and Refugee Board of Canada, "Kenya: Information on Kisii marriage customs and whether women are, at times, abducted and coerced into marriage",
The Turkana tribe also practised marriage by abduction. In this culture, bridal kidnapping (akomari) occurred before any formal attempts to arrange a marriage with a bride's family. According to one scholar, a successful bridal kidnapping raised the abductor's reputation in his community, and allowed him to negotiate a lower bride price with his wife's family. Should an attempted abductor fail to seize his bride, he was bound to pay a bride price to the woman's family, provide additional gifts and payments to the family, and to have an arranged marriage (akota).
Rwanda
Bride-kidnapping is prevalent in areas of Rwanda.Julius Adekunle, Culture and Customs of Rwanda, Published by Greenwood Publishing Group, 2007, p. 106 Often the abductor kidnaps the woman from her household or follows her outside and abducts her. He and his companions may then rape the woman to ensure that she submits to the marriage.Tom Streissguth, Rwanda in Pictures, p. 39; Jean Ruremesha, RIGHTS-RWANDA: Marriage by Abduction Worries Women's Groups , Inter Press Service, 7 October 2003. The family of the woman either then feels obliged to consent to the union,Ruremesha, RIGHTS-RWANDA: Marriage by Abduction Worries Women's Groups. or is forced to when the kidnapper impregnates her, as pregnant women are not seen as eligible for marriage. The marriage is confirmed with a ceremony that follows the abduction by several days. In such ceremonies, the abductor asks his bride's parents to forgive him for abducting their daughter. The man may offer a cow, money, or other goods as restitution to his bride's family.Streissguth, p. 39.